Congratulations, You’re Doing Great! (Unless You’re Not, In Which Case, Yikes)

A Brutally Honest Yet Weirdly Uplifting Affirmation Track for Navigating the Hot Mess That Is Life

Welcome to your 7-8 minute guided meditation audio, designed for those thriving one minute and absolutely unraveling the next.

In this meditation, you will:

🎢 Breathe in success, exhale mild existential dread—because you’re crushing it or being crushed, and honestly, it’s a coin toss.
🎢 Celebrate small wins—like remembering to eat lunch or not crying in public today.
🎢 Repeat affirmations with chaotic conviction—such as "I’m a rockstar… or a rock-bottom star, still counts!"
🎢 Visualize your life as both a success story and a full-blown circus act—because, let’s be real, it’s both.
🎢 Embrace the mystery of whether you’re killing it or barely holding on—spoiler: it’s probably both.

As this meditation ends, take a deep breath and step forward with delusional confidence—because you’re either winning or spectacularly failing, and at this point, does it even matter?

Namaste, you glorious wrecks. Yikes or yay—keep flailing, it’s your brand.